July 23, 2019
At the end of last year, I realised I needed a change. And when I say change, I realised that I needed to quit my job.
After Burnout I Was Unemployed For Six Months. It Was The Best Thing To Ever Happen To Me
They don’t call it millennial burnout for nothing. Too scared to leave the world of education and do anything that might even vaguely be described as ‘adulting’, I jumped straight into an ill-advised Masters after leaving university, and stuck at it for three weeks before realising that there was nothing I wanted to do less than study for another year.
What to do instead? Travelling was out of the question. I saw how well my friends were doing, smoothly transitioning from their degrees to well-paid grad jobs in London (paying, it seemed to me, unbelievable sums) and knew what I ‘had’ to do. I couldn’t afford to fall behind; instead, I spent a frantic three months applying for jobs whilst working at my local cafe. Call it an overdeveloped sense of FOMO, call it whatever you want – all I knew was that I didn’t want to get left behind. After all, I had a degree. Surely I had to put it to some use?
So I did. After weeks of panic, I clinched a role: working in marketing, in London. I was ecstatic. That was the dream, right?
Almost two years later, I realised it wasn’t. I knew three months in the role wasn't for me, but I was too scared to start job-hunting again so soon... what if I wasn't good enough to find anything better?Perhaps it should have been obvious from the start that the job wasn’t for me. I knew that three months in, but I was too scared to start job-hunting again so soon into the role. What if employers would blacklist me for doing so? What if (thought to myself in the wee hours of the morning) I just wasn’t good enough to find anything better?
All these expectations – all the pressure I was putting on myself – mixed together to form a toxic cocktail. A slow decline in morale meant that my standard of work started to slip. Personal life got in the way. Everything began to pile up, and I started comparing myself to my friends. Thoughts started chasing each other around my head when I lay in bed, trying to sleep. How well were they doing? Why wasn’t I earning as much as they were?
Panic set in. I spent most of my free time desperately finding and applying to positions I didn’t want; the boss called me in and told me, very gently, that he was here if I needed anything, but that I needed to apply myself more. Pull my socks up and get on with it. 
I agreed, and in my head, set a new goal: the date I was going to resign.
A break, I reasoned, would give me much needed time. Time to breathe; time to reassess my priorities. Time to find out what I really wanted to do with my life. And some much-needed time to recharge my batteries. I’d started having panic attacks. Who knew how much longer I could have stayed where I was?
Just before Christmas, I walked out of the world of work and into the world of unemployment. It’s been an eye-opener. I had next to no money and was living out of my savings, but I had that time I wanted. Those first mornings waking up and watching my flatmates leave for work, knowing I had nothing planned for my day, that was strange. But, slowly, it became normal. 
And suddenly unemployment didn’t seem that scary any more.
Now I could find out more about what I actually wanted to do. I’d been so obsessed with getting a job and living the London dream that I hadn’t actually stopped to consider what I wanted to do. Now, I could apply for internships, I could do those internships, and I could fit them around any shift work that I managed to pick up: as a receptionist, as a waiter, as anything that paid.
I found out that I liked to write; so I started a blog. I read and read and read, and eventually realised that publishing might be a good career avenue to explore. I had several memorable moments working as a journalist and met quite a few childhood heroes. They were checkpoints on my CV, yes, but they were also moments that helped me realise what I enjoyed doing; what I might want to do with my life.
I could also travel. People say that taking a gap year is the best time to do that, but I’d beg to differ. I was nowhere near brave enough to travel around Europe –  or, indeed, anywhere – at the age of eighteen, let alone solo. In the past six months, I’ve managed to tick off a few bucket-list destinations, and spend time with my family. And forcing myself to take a step back has given me some much-needed perspective. It’s helped me realise something that I’m still just coming to terms with: I didn’t have to compare myself to my friends in order to consider myself successful. That’s been the hardest lesson of all.Six months on, I’m sitting down and starting to apply for jobs again. Older? Yes. Wiser? Most definitely.Now, six months on, I’m sitting down and starting to apply for jobs again. Older? Yes. Wiser? Most definitely. It’s easy to obsess about setting foot on and progressing up the career ladder when you leave university: get a job, start grafting. We’re told from the moment we start school that success means money, and we live in a country with a competitive job market, so it’s no surprise that so many millennials suffer from burnout. In fact, 74% of us say we’re so stressed that it’s difficult to cope. Taking a step back and sideways out of that was the hardest, but best, thing I’ve ever done. It’s probably also helped me avoid a mental breakdown. 
And now? Who knows what job I’ll get, but I do know two things: it’ll be something I want to do. It’s okay if that’s different to what my friends are doing. 
And I’ll be better off for it.
Vicky Jessop is a blogger and journalist
Have a compelling personal story you want to tell? Find out what we’re looking for here, and pitch us on ukpersonal@huffpost.comMore from HuffPost UK Personal I'm Genderfluid: This Is What It's Like To Live As A Man And A Woman I Lost My Sight At 23. This Is What It Did To My Mental Health. A Good Samaritan Saved My Life. Now I Want To Find Her And Say Thank You.
Related Stories
Latest News
Top news around the world
Academy Awards

‘Oppenheimer’ Reigns at Oscars With Seven Wins, Including Best Picture and Director

Get the latest news about the 2024 Oscars, including nominations, winners, predictions and red carpet fashion at 96th Academy Awards

Around the World

Celebrity News

> Latest News in Media

Watch It
Olivia Munn Reveals Breast Cancer Diagnosis and Double Mastectomy Procedure | E! News
March 13, 2024
kUaEV1Kd3S0
Travis Kelce Shares Details From His Trip to Singapore With Taylor Swift | E! News
March 13, 2024
3YXi-Dgf4eg
Kate Middleton VIRAL Photo: Agency Addresses Photoshop Claims | E! News
March 13, 2024
S4VkO0TpkCY
Da'Vine Joy Randolph Plays 'Smash or Pass' With Iconic Moments From Her Career
March 13, 2024
vkPdJEF2BX4
Jean Smart Wears a Hotel Bathrobe to Present an Award to Hannah Einbinder l Power of Comedy SxSW
March 12, 2024
Bw7uVEYQev4
Lenny Kravitz Walk of Fame Ceremony
March 12, 2024
MlWq8BcnwhE
Dak Prescott Extortion Plot & Steph Curry for President? | TMZ Sports Full Ep - 3/12/24
March 13, 2024
jHFsrjs7OFY
A Japanese space rocket blew up after takeoff Tuesday, turning the sky into a fireball of smoke.
March 13, 2024
YkfJ3Qg8B7c
#KimKardashian and #BiancaCensori hung out at #KanyeWest's listening party Tuesday night!
March 13, 2024
EfwLLq6bx9k
‘Pioneer Woman’ Ree Drummond denies using Ozempic to lose 60 pounds
March 13, 2024
Omfjk1AlZ3A
Chrissy Teigen reveals her ‘boob lift scars’ in daring dress at Jay-Z & Beyoncé’s Oscars 2024 party
March 13, 2024
VxZ2qXAlpmU
Zoë Kravitz pokes fun at dad Lenny Kravitz's style during Hollywood Walk of Fame speech
March 13, 2024
j3-lcFu_1sQ
TV Schedule
Late Night Show
Watch the latest shows of U.S. top comedians

Sports

Latest sport results, news, videos, interviews and comments
Latest Events
17
Mar
SPAIN: La Liga
Atletico Madrid - Barcelona
17
Mar
ENGLAND: FA Cup
Manchester United - Liverpool
17
Mar
ITALY: Serie A
Inter Milan - Napoli
17
Mar
GERMANY: Bundesliga
Borussia Dortmund - Eintracht Frankfurt
17
Mar
ENGLAND: FA Cup
Chelsea - Leicester City
17
Mar
ITALY: Serie A
Roma - Sassuolo
17
Mar
ITALY: Serie A
Verona - AC Milan
17
Mar
ITALY: Serie A
Juventus - Genoa
17
Mar
GERMANY: Bundesliga
SC Freiburg - Bayer Leverkusen
17
Mar
USA: Major League Soccer
Atlanta United - Orlando City
17
Mar
ENGLAND: Premier League
West Ham United - Aston Villa
17
Mar
SPAIN: La Liga
Rayo Vallecano - Real Betis
17
Mar
ENGLAND: Championship
Leeds - Millwall
17
Mar
SPAIN: La Liga
Las Palmas - Almeria
17
Mar
SPAIN: La Liga
Villarreal - Valencia
17
Mar
SPAIN: La Liga
Sevilla - Celta Vigo
16
Mar
GERMANY: Bundesliga
Darmstadt - Bayern Munich
16
Mar
ENGLAND: FA Cup
Manchester City - Newcastle United
16
Mar
ENGLAND: Premier League
Fulham - Tottenham Hotspur
16
Mar
SPAIN: La Liga
Osasuna - Real Madrid
13
Mar
CHAMPIONS LEAGUE: 1/8 Final
Atletico Madrid - Inter Milan
12
Mar
CHAMPIONS LEAGUE: 1/8 Final
Barcelona - Napoli
12
Mar
CHAMPIONS LEAGUE: 1/8 Final
Arsenal - Porto
11
Mar
ENGLAND: Premier League
Chelsea - Newcastle United
10
Mar
ENGLAND: Premier League
Liverpool - Manchester City
10
Mar
SPAIN: La Liga
Real Madrid - Celta Vigo
10
Mar
ENGLAND: Premier League
Aston Villa - Tottenham Hotspur
10
Mar
ITALY: Serie A
Juventus - Atalanta
10
Mar
ITALY: Serie A
Fiorentina - Roma
10
Mar
ITALY: Serie A
AC Milan - Empoli
09
Mar
GERMANY: Bundesliga
Werder Bremen - Borussia Dortmund
09
Mar
ENGLAND: Premier League
Arsenal - Brentford
09
Mar
ITALY: Serie A
Bologna - Inter Milan
Find us on Instagram
at @feedimo to stay up to date with the latest.
Featured Video You Might Like
zWJ3MxW_HWA L1eLanNeZKg i1XRgbyUtOo -g9Qziqbif8 0vmRhiLHE2U JFCZUoa6MYE UfN5PCF5EUo 2PV55f3-UAg W3y9zuI_F64 -7qCxIccihU pQ9gcOoH9R8 g5MRDEXRk4k
Copyright © 2020 Feedimo. All Rights Reserved.