August 20, 2020

Late night hosts were perplexed at Bidens low-rent nomination party, Trumps Goodyear boycott, calamari
"Yesterday was Day 2 of the Democratic National Convention," and some things really are better in this all-online format, like Rhode Island's calamari-centric roll call vote, Trevor Noah said on Wednesday's Daily Show. The night also had "speeches from Jill Biden, Bill Clinton, Colin Powell, and a quick appearance from AOC" that "a bunch of media outlets who should know better" ingenuously tried to paint as a Biden snub."The night's big moment was when Joe Biden officially became the Democratic nominee — and for reasons I don't understand, the DNC also made it the weirdest moment," Noah said. "What the hell was that? The music, the basement library, the cheap party decorations — I thought the Democrats had millions of dollars for this. Why did it feel like the grand opening of a used Kia dealership? Like, did they blow all their money on the calamari?"
"It looked like they swung by the party supply store an hour before and were, like, 'What can we get for $6?" James Corden agreed at The Late Late Show. He was curious why Rhode Island had "a character from Mortal Kombat holding" it's roll-call calamari, but he did find young Joe Biden quite "strapping" in the photo montages.
"There have been some memorable moments," including "the guy from Rhode Island apparently holding a plate of calamari hostage?" Seth Meyers said on Late Night. The DNC also featured "some of the party's most talented rising stars, so Fox News was desperate to counter-program it," as is Trump.
"While the Democrats have been laying out a case that Trump is grossly unfit for office, Trump has been focused on his top priority: Proving that he is grossly unfit for office," Stephen Colbert said at The Late Show. Trump embraced the adulation from the "insane right-wing conspiracy group called QAnon," and "also got mad at Goodyear, the tire people," calling for a boycott over its MAGA hat policy. "Goodyear is headquartered in Ohio, which is a 2020 swing state, and they employ roughly 63,000 people," he noted, so "go ahead, boycott one of the biggest employers in a swing state, and don't forget to boycott Iowa corn, Wisconsin cheese, and Florida meth gators."
The Goodyear blimp took the fight to Trump at The Late Show.
"Trump supporters were, like, 'That's it, I'm getting rid of my blimp! Cancel the Blimpers for Trump rally!'" Jimmy Fallon said at The Tonight Show. And "I actually feel bad for Biden — the guy's been in public office for 50 years, he finally wins the Democratic nomination, and then has to celebrate in the back of an abandoned library." He also really leaned into the calamari. Watch below.

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