April 08, 2020

Stephen Colbert, Trevor Noah, and Jimmy Kimmel request that Trump grow up and do your damn job
"Every day I wake up convinced I have the virus," Jimmy Kimmel said on Tuesday's Kimmel Live. "They say the symptoms include being exhausted and aching all over, but those are also the symptoms of having young children."President Trump switched press secretaries, hiring loyal Team Trumper Kayleigh McEnany, who back in February, wisely said" Trump would keep the coronavirus out of America, Kimmel said. Trump, meanwhile, has been using his daily press briefings "to beat up on the press," getting especially belligerent about "a report put out by his own administration that said hospitals have a shortage of supplies and long waits for tests," Kimmel said. It's obviously true, "but this report made him so angry he even went after a reporter for Fox News."
"Yes, a reporter's job isn't to ask questions, it is to praise the president for doing a great job," Stephen Colbert deadpanned on A Late Show, showing Trump's mean-girl answers. "Trump doesn't understand that no one cares about these hissy fits anymore," he said. "It doesn't matter who you voted for, everyone just wants to know the truth, because that's how you stay alive. So grow up and do your damn job! We have to; you should, too."In Wisconsin, Republicans forced the state to hold its primary on Tuesday, coronavirus be damned. "I guess it's the Wisconsin way of showing New Hampshire that you can live free and die," Colbert said. "It's clearly sadistic to make people risk their lives to vote," but thanks to conservatives on two supreme courts, "voters were forced to do their best today, lining up at polling places to perform their constitutional duty and hoping not to get sick."
"So, the big question is, why are many Republicans in Wisconsin and around the country resisting efforts to make it easier to vote?" Trevor Noah said on The Daily Show. "They're still giving their usual talking points about trying to prevent 'voter fraud,' but recently, prominent Republican leaders have been slipping up and telling the truth," including Trump. "These Republicans are afraid that if more people get access to voting, they're going to lose elections, and so instead of just coming up with policies that are more popular, they'd rather just make it harder to vote?" he summarized. "Basically, these Republicans believe in the free market for everything except themselves." Watch below.

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