December 06, 2019

Stephen Colbert, Jimmy Kimmel, and Trevor Noah warn against messing with Nancy Pelosi, Barron Trump
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi warned a reporter from the conservative Sinclair TV network not to "mess with" her on Thursday, and The Late Show found that advice sound, to the tune of "Bad Bad Leroy Brown."
Before her "spirited" press conference, "Pelosi had a big announcement" on the impeachment inquiry, Stephen Colbert said in his monologue, though he seemed underwhelmed that "we're about to start the beginning of the middle" of impeaching President Trump. He chuckled at Pelosi's notion that "we Catholics don't hate anyone," historically speaking, but he tipped his hat to her moxie: "Nancy Pelosi prays for the president, and I pray for that reporter. 'Uh, Madame Speaker, follow-up question: Can I have my balls back?'"
It was certainly "a feisty and festive day in Washington, D.C," Jimmy Kimmel said on Kimmel Live. Pelosi announced that "the House Judiciary Committee will now draft articles of impeachment against the president of the Untied States. This is big: This will be the first draft Donald Trump can't dodge."On Wednesday, "the House heard testimony from four legal scholars, three of whom agreed that Trump's abuse of power is worse than any president in the history of presidents," Kimmel said. "These were professors from Stanford Law, Harvard Law, highly respected schools, and so naturally Trump sent his scariest crow out to discredit their credits." But Kellyanne Conway wasn't alone — Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas) tried to co-opt Willie Nelson to mock Stanford and Harvard Law, succeedingly only in making a mockery of himself, Kimmel laughed.
"What? 'Mama's don't let your babies go to Harvard or Stanford'? That took a weird turn," Trevor Noah agreed at The Daily Show, dramatizing Gohmert's bizarre polemic. While most of Wednesday's legal scholars "agreed that DJT needs to GTFO," he added, "according to the Republicans on the committee, these people weren't saying this because they're constitutional scholars; no, they were saying it because they're drinking Trump haterade." And one of them, Pamela Karlan, gifted them "a joke that backfired hard" involving 13-year-old Barron Trump, Noah sighed. "No, professor, what were you doing? You were brought in for your legal expertise, not to try and make jokes. The C in C-SPAN doesn't stand for comedy." He advised people to stick to making fun of Don Jr. and Eric. Watch below.

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