"The news is so dark these days, I'd like to start off tonight with a story of hope that honors an
American hero,"
Stephen Colbert said on Tuesday's
Late Show, narrating a viral video involving an airport beverage cart. "You know who else liked that video? Donald Trump." He was serious. "I agree, Mr. President. I think we can all relate to the story of a dangerous, out-of-control thing being stopped just in time," Colbert deadpanned, and he was off to Trump's galloping
Ukraine scandal, focusing on Trump's inner circle.Colbert started with Attorney General
William Barr, who's "traveling the world trying to prove that all of Trump's conspiracy theories are true. He's gonna find Obama's birth certificate. He's gonna rescue all the people that
aliens abducted from Trump's inauguration crowd, and finally bring help to hurricane-ravaged Alabama." Barr has requested help from Australia and visited
Britain and Italy. "Really? Italy?" Colbert asked. "Either Barr's on a worldwide collusion tour or he's on the journey of midlife discovery called 'Eat, Pray, Lie.'" He also recounted the troubles of the other two members of Trump's "about-to-lose-power trio,"
Secretary of State Mike Pompeo and Rudy Giuliani.
At
The Daily Show,
Trevor Noah put on a wig and impeached Giuliani — which isn't a thing for private lawyers, but his case was pretty solid.
Trump and his allies have been attacking the credibility of the whistleblower, but the intelligence community inspector general (ICIG), a Trump appointee, just debunked their main claims,
Jimmy Kimmel said at Kimmel Live. "Basically, the IG gave the president an FU. So the inspector specifically says Trump and his supporters are wrong, the whistleblower had firsthand information that is credible and urgent, and now in a normal situation, that would be the end of that, they would stop making this claim of hearsay. But in this case, we apply the fundamental theory on which the Trump presidency is based: the Theory of Inverse Validity, which states that 'Things that are true are false.'" With this maxim, "anything is possible," he added. "Suddenly, bacon is health food, Batman is real, and
Fox News is news." Watch below.