If your kid says “no pictures,” maybe don’t take pictures and exploit them on social media,
Emma Teitel writes.
If like me, you aren’t a big fan of the Kardashian/Jenner clan, but you love someone who is and therefore must occasionally tolerate the famous family on your living room TV, you are probably aware of the following fact: they are constantly reproducing.
You don’t have to be a faithful viewer of the show or browse their never-ending Instagram feeds to know that at any given time one of them is with child and that child will come to bear the name of a point on a compass (North, born to Kim and Kanye in 2013); a close friend of God (Saint, born to Kim and Kanye in 2015); a series of thoughts had during sleep (Dream, born to Rob Kardashian and Blac Chyna in 2016); a major city (Chicago, born to Kim and Kanye in 2018); and, most recently, a porn star romantically linked to U.S. President Donald J. Trump (Stormi, born in February to Kylie Jenner and rapper Travis Scott).
Oh and I almost forgot, there’s another little K on the way. Khloe Kardashian and NBA star Tristan Thompson are expecting their first child together potentially next month, a girl whose name we don’t yet know but one we can safely assume will not be Rachel. My money is on Karma, or if her parents choose to carry on the Trump-inspired tradition, Mueller. Whatever it is, Khloe recently revealed that she hopes her daughter — who is still in the womb, by the way — grows up to excel at “self love,” speak multiple languages, and sing.
My hope for little Mueller, however, is that she leaves home as early as possible and finds meaning outside the vapid brand that is her brood.
If you think I’m being harsh — I am.
The truth is, I’m creeped out — or I should say, kreeped out — by a group of adults who announce every major event in their lives like a blockbuster movie. And every pregnancy like a new perfume. Last month Kylie Jenner released a deeply personal 11-minute video set to soft piano music called “To Our Daughter,” chronicling her pregnancy with Stormi and of course, the baby’s birth. This week Jenner gave her more than 100 million followers a photographic sneak peek into Stormi’s nursery. Some consider this recent activity to be a touching break from the traditional narcissism of the Kardashian-Jenner clan.
But I preferred the family’s traditional narcissism — the infinite selfies — to their new hobby: the social media exploitation of their kids.
Wait a minute, what about the British royals? Aren’t they just as bad? After all, they knowingly bear children who will inherit fame, press scrutiny and tedious responsibility they didn’t ask for.
Well, yes, all of that is true, but the difference between the two is that while the British royals appear to do everything in their power to shield their kids from the limelight, America’s royals — the KJs — gleefully thrust their kids into it.
I’m thinking in particular of a video presented by most media outlets as cute but that struck me as extremely weird. Posted in 2016 by
Kim Kardashian, it features her toddler, North, imploring her mom to stop taking pictures of her. “No pictures,” the little girl demands, wearing — what else — an oversized fur coat and a pair of Uggs.
I don’t doubt that Kim Kardashian loves her kids and I don’t claim to understand the pressures of parenting, let alone parenting in the public eye, because I’m not a mother yet. But there are little kids in my life that I love and if one of them said “no pictures,” I would put my camera away.
Kids are not dogs. They deserve privacy. And they deserve dignity, even if their names are undignified.
Emma Teitel is a national affairs columnist.