Stephen Colbert began Thursday's
Late Show wishing "the insane clown president" was as willing to follow the science as the Insane Clown Posse, which just canceled this year's shows to save fans from COVID-19. The
Trump Administration, on the other hand, just ousted Dr. Rick Bright, "the director of the lead federal agency searching for a
Coronavirus vaccine," allegedly "because of his concern about Trump's coronavirus treatment theory.""That's right, Trump fired a guy named Dr. Bright — he also let go Prof. Smarty, Dr. Savior, and Secretary Ihavethecuredontfireme," Colbert joked. But "Dr. Bright's not the only expert that Trump is shutting up."
"Trump is on quite a roll contradicting his own infectious disease experts almost every day on his daily televised temper tantrum," said
Jimmy Kimmel, whose daughter did his makeup. "These poor doctors working for Trump" can't lie and can't tell the truth, he said. "So their only option is to play dumb and hope Trump gets distracted by a Filet-O-Fish or something." Kimmel found it "depressing" Trump fired Dr. Bright for trying to save Americans from hydroxychloroquine and also that "we're not even remotely surprised that he did," but he was amused at the hiring of a former Labradoodle breeder to head a U.S. coronavirus task force.
The Late Show imagined the unqualified Labradoodle breeder at a coronavirus briefing.
"This
White House seems to think of chaos as an essential service that they need to keep providing,"
Trevor Noah said at
The Daily Show. But "maybe the vaccine guy is actually lucky that Trump doesn't know who the hell he is, because the people that Trump does know, they have it even worse."So does Georgia's
Republican governor, who tried to make Trump proud, unsuccessfully, by reopening the
economy, Noah said. "Trump didn't just throw Brian Kemp under the bus. He basically looked up the bus schedule in advance, told Brian Kemp to meet him at the road at 3:15, and then guess who was driving? And you know, this is what you get when you roll with
Donald Trump. These guys are trying so hard to suck up to him, and then when they're fully committed, bam! He can just sell you out."
If you're confused about the coronavirus, The Daily Show's Desi Lydic said, "I've been watching
Fox News for 48 hours straight, and I think I'm ready to FOXplain it." Watch below.